While Gisele Bündchen may look beautiful on magazine covers and charismatic as a TV host, the famed model has revealed her truth about depression, panic attacks, and suicidal thoughts.

“I had a wonderful position in my career, and I was very close to my family, and I always considered myself a positive person, so I was really beating myself up. Like, ‘Why should I be feeling this?’ I felt like I wasn’t allowed to feel bad,” Bündchen said in an interview with People magazine. “But I felt powerless. Your world becomes smaller and smaller, and you can’t breathe, which is the worst feeling I’ve ever had.”

The Brazilian star continued to explain how she did not have a healthy outlet to express her anxieties, which led down a darker path. “I actually had the feeling of, ‘If I just jump off my roof, this is going to end, and I never have to worry about this feeling of my world closing in,'” Bündchen said.

Now, Bündchen has found peace in her family, lifestyle changes, and professional assistance. As a way of sharing her life with audiences that have gone through similar hardships, Bündchen is releasing a tell-all memoir 'Lessons: My Path to a Meaningful Life.'