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Not eating for an outfit -

Whether you're wearing something tight that you decided you have to starve yourself for, or if the starving precedes fitting into the outfit, many don’t realize how harmful this normalization can be to those with an ED.

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Talking about "deserving" food -

The idea that one needs to deserve to eat is very harmful for anyone, even more so for those with an ED. You deserve to eat whether you went on a run or not.

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Not eating to "cancel out" the calories when you go out -

Not eating breakfast before going out to a lunch buffet feels perfectly logical, but it’s this mathematical substitution of meals that is harmful for those struggling with an ED.

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Casually bringing up how little you ate today -

People sometimes express that they hardly ate as mere fact, but sometimes it’s with pride or to justify having a big meal, and both of those can be harmful.

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Before and after photos -

These can be effective tools for your personal fitness goals, but they quickly turn harmful with the celebration of smaller bodies, putting unnecessary pressure on others who may feel they have a "before" body when really everyone’s body should be a "now" body.

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Saying things like, "Wow, someone’s hungry" -

Commenting on people’s plates is dangerous because you never know what their relationship to food is or how that small comment will affect them.

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Saying things like "You didn’t eat much" -

Again, commenting on how little someone is eating can also be harmful if they’re struggling with an eating disorder. That small amount might be an achievement for them.

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Not eating before going out to "have more fun" -

More common in younger crowds going out to drink, some may prefer to eat less so they can drink less to feel tipsier.

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Saying you need to go work out after a big meal - Taking an action after eating, as if punishing yourself, can be very triggering for someone with an ED who may already be struggling with certain harmful post-meal tendencies.

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Vocabulary such as "pulling trig" -

The term "pulling trig" is slang among younger crowds for making yourself vomit, and for obvious reasons normalizing this behavior is dangerous.

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Commenting on other people’s clothing choices -

You might think you’re just giving good advice, but it can be harmful because you don’t know what someone is comfortable wearing, and no one should be pressured to show more or less of their body than they’re comfortable with.

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Talking about things like "freshman 15" or "bikini body" -

Weight-centered dialogue, especially at the beginning of such a vulnerable and stressful time like the start of school or the summer season, can spark or accelerate EDs to a dangerous degree.

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Wishing you had an eating disorder -

This may sound bizarre, but casual comments like these are more common than you think. An ED, however, is not something anybody would truly wish for.

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Asking what diet someone is on -

Society praises weight loss and people are constantly looking for the latest diet, but if a person with an ED is losing weight and gets positive feedback from other people about weight loss, this can encourage disordered eating behaviors.

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Criticizing your own appearance -

Talking about fat on your own body can be harmful not only to yourself but to those around you. People with an ED are already hyper-aware of themselves and they may feel that if you judge yourself that harshly, you’re judging them equally as harshly as well.

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Making others feel bad for not working out -

When you struggle with an ED, it can be really difficult for someone to tell you that you just need to do more physical activity, firstly because you could lack the energy, secondly because the problem is much deeper rooted than just slimming down a little.

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Cheat days -

Similar to bingeing, framing some foods as against the rules is what a person with an ED is struggling to stop doing.

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Talking about your ideal size -

It’s fine to have a personal health goal, but it can easily cross the line into harmful for both you and whoever is listening. Numbers in terms of weight and size can be huge triggers for people with an ED.

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Talking about your weight -

Realistically, no one needs to know this except you and your doctor, but we’re so conditioned to talk about it casually now that we don’t realize how dangerous it can be. Again, the scale can be very triggering.

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Counting calories -

Yes, everyone should try to eat a healthy amount of calories, but our fixation with them has normalized an obsessive tendency common in eating disorders.

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Comparing your non-ED struggles with an ED -

What works for you, and what doesn’t trigger you, likely is not the case for someone struggling with an ED. There are no quick fixes like the right diet or more exercise, and the mental struggle cannot be compared.

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Congratulating someone with an ED for eating -

People with EDs often feel anxious that everyone is watching them eat, and while you may mean it with genuine sincerity in your heart, many people have said that being congratulated for eating is a triggering compliment.

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Telling someone that it’s ridiculous, or to just eat -

It’s nowhere near as simple as you might think. It’s not about someone’s intelligence, about whether you think they look fine, or about them not wanting to heal.

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And now for things you SHOULD do: -

The first is to educate yourself on the different forms of eating disorders, and hold yourself and others accountable when it comes to this language of normalization.

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Understand that an ED doesn’t have a certain look -

Many people think an eating disorder looks like a dangerously skinny person, usually a woman, but that’s far from the truth.

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Consider non-appearance based comments -

In general, it is a good policy to avoid any reference to a person’s size, shape, or weight. Focus compliments on abstract things like their brightness, or how they speak about their passion, or how funny they are.

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Make compassionate statements to those with an ED -

Instead of unsolicited and uneducated advice, offer compassionate statements that acknowledge that what they’re going through is difficult and that you’re there to support them.

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Adopt a healthier relationship to your own body -

Not being so critical of your own size, weight, or shape will ease the pressure on those around you as well.

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See also - Celebrities who have had eating disorders

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