Art, obsession, and identity
The rising number of people being ghosted needs to be considered in the context of the digital age. Indeed, with the dawn of dating apps, people have simultaneously become more uncomfortable dealing with difficult emotions, and have become less accountable to people they've never met in person.
In some cases, people choose to ghost because it is the easiest way to end contact with a person who is just one on a list of many.
Regardless of the reasons for doing it, ghosting can be very distressing for the victim. It can cause feelings of sadness, loss, and confusion.
Indeed, in the event of being rejected, lots of people find it helpful to receive an explicit reason for why the other person does not want to pursue the relationship.
With ghosting, there is no such explanation on offer, and people often struggle to find closure. It is for this reason that ghosting is generally considered a no-go.
The first situation in which ghosting may be acceptable is when you have only ever met the other person online. Of course, this depends on the specific situation, but, in general, we owe less to people who we've never met in person.
This is particularly true if not much time and effort has been invested, or if things start to get weird between you and the person you've been chatting with.
The next situation in which it may well be acceptable to ghost someone is if the first date or in-person meetup is a complete disaster.
Now, this is not about a lack of connection or feelings of awkwardness. If that is what you are feeling, a simple follow-up message is most appropriate.
Unfortunately, many of us have been in a situation where we meet someone and things are great initially, but they quickly start to become weird.
Another situation in which it is okay to cut off contact with someone without warning is if their behavior becomes creepy or inappropriate.
If someone you have been talking to starts showing up in places you didn't invite them to, feel free to cut off contact with them. Your safety comes first.
If someone has lied about their identity, whether in full or in part, this should be considered a huge red flag and is clear justification for ghosting.
You may also feel that ghosting is acceptable in the context of other lies. After all, if someone does not tell you the truth, do they really deserve an explanation for why you cut off contact?
It is also acceptable to ghost someone who catfishes you. Unfortunately, it happens all too often that we meet up with someone and they are not who they said they were.
This one is perhaps debatable, but some would argue that it is okay to ghost someone if, when you meet in person, you have a bad gut feeling about them.
In this scenario, you may feel it is more appropriate to send a short message to the other person, ending contact. However, if you feel that would be risky or unsafe, it's not a must.
Indeed, there are many situations in life where we would do well to listen more to our gut; there is a lot of value in trusting our intuition.
According to one study from 2023, the most common deal-breakers are apathy, grossness, clinginess, and addiction.
Lastly, most people would say that it's acceptable to ghost another person if their behavior leaves you feeling completely unclear about where you stand.
For example, if someone refuses to answer, or is vague when answering basic questions like whether they are in another relationship, this is reason enough for ghosting.
You should never feel guilty about cutting off contact with someone who refuses to enter into simple conversations or establish basic facts.
So there you have it, a few scenarios in which it is okay to ghost. Remember, these scenarios are the exception to the rule. In the vast majority of cases, the respectful thing to do is to offer the other person a short explanation for why you don't want to pursue the relationship.
Sources: (CNN) (YourTango)
See also: A guide to modern dating rules: what to keep and what to change
Research shows that when it comes to choosing a romantic partner, we all have so-called deal-breakers. These are character traits that we just wouldn't accept in our partner.
If you are familiar with your biggest deal-breaker and spot early signs of it in the person, this can be reason enough to suddenly cut contact.
<p>Have you ever been chatting with someone online and thinking it's going really well, only for them to disappear without a trace? If you have, you're certainly not alone. In response to a 2023 survey conducted by the Thriving Center of Psychology, 84% of people reported having been ghosted, whether by a romantic partner, a friend, or an acquaintance. On the other side of the coin, 65% reported having ghosted someone else.</p><p>In general, ghosting is considered inappropriate and disrespectful behavior. As with anything, however, there are exceptions. Curious? Check out this gallery to find out more.</p>
Unique situations where it's actually okay to ghost someone
Because not all ghosters are created equal
LIFESTYLE Dating
Have you ever been chatting with someone online and thinking it's going really well, only for them to disappear without a trace? If you have, you're certainly not alone. In response to a 2023 survey conducted by the Thriving Center of Psychology, 84% of people reported having been ghosted, whether by a romantic partner, a friend, or an acquaintance. On the other side of the coin, 65% reported having ghosted someone else.
In general, ghosting is considered inappropriate and disrespectful behavior. As with anything, however, there are exceptions. Curious? Check out this gallery to find out more.