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Common misconceptions about love
- There isn't a single formula or list of rules about love. Every relationship is unique and everyone behaves and relates to love in different ways. The base of any relationship is trust and respect, although there are many false (yet popular) ideas about how to love another person. According to Margarida Vieite, a specialist in family therapy at the University of Seville, many of these misleading ideas seem romantic, but in reality may actually be quite toxic. Don't let yourself get fooled by the following lies about love!
© Shutterstock
0 / 30 Fotos
If you are jealous, you are crazy about me! - According to Margarida Vieite, a specialist in family therapy at the University of Seville, when our partner is over-the-top jealous, it's a sign that they need help. Jealousy reveals deep-seeded insecurity, and low self-esteem, and can be a sign of an obsessive disorder.
© Shutterstock
1 / 30 Fotos
Love at first sight - Love is reciprocal and requires hard work, acceptance, and forgiveness. According to the specialist, it arises from mutual appreciation and trust.
© Shutterstock
2 / 30 Fotos
Now that I won you over, you're mine! - Winning over your significant other is a daily process. We don't belong to anyone but ourselves, and people are not possessions.
© Shutterstock
3 / 30 Fotos
If you don't call me after a first date, you don't love me - Calm down! No one falls in love at first sight. Even if the date was incredible for both people, not calling the next day doesn't necessarily mean that the other person is not interested. According to Margarida Vieite, love involves getting to know and discover who the other person is. It requires time.
© Shutterstock
4 / 30 Fotos
My other half is out there somewhere... - You don't need another person to feel complete. You already are.
© Shutterstock
5 / 30 Fotos
Love means doing everything together! - Doing activities together is great, but loving someone also means giving them the freedom to live their own lives and do things alone or with friends, family, and coworkers. Everyone needs to respect the individuality of their partner.
© Shutterstock
6 / 30 Fotos
You say that you like me, but I need to pressure you to be with me - If someone really loves another person, they will make time to be with them even if they are busy, according to the family therapist.
© Shutterstock
7 / 30 Fotos
I believe you love me but you criticize, blame, and laugh at me - Some people have distorted ideas about love. Putting down another person, laughing at them, or blaming them for something they have no control over is definitely not love.
© Shutterstock
8 / 30 Fotos
If you love me, do everything I say - Loving another person does not make them your slave. It means hearing their wants, needs, and priorities, without sacrificing your own interests, dreams, and goals, according to Margarida Vieite.
© Shutterstock
9 / 30 Fotos
Love means not having any differences
- Many people search for someone who shares the same interests and opinions. However, having differences between you and your partner is actually healthy, as you both learn to respect the individuality of the other.
© Shutterstock
10 / 30 Fotos
Love means not having any differences - However, when differences involve principles, values, relationship styles, and life goals, it can be difficult to maintain a relationship.
© Shutterstock
11 / 30 Fotos
It's possible to love without trust - The base of a healthy relationship is honesty, respect, and trust. The psychologist confirms that if you cannot trust your partner, you can never fully give yourself to them and love them.
© Shutterstock
12 / 30 Fotos
Fighting means you don't love each other - It's acceptable to have arguments. When the emotions get intense, it's important to try to remain calm and hear the point of view of the other person.
© Shutterstock
13 / 30 Fotos
If you pressure me to be intimate, it's because you love me - A person who pressures another into having physical relations does not love nor respect the will of their partner.
© Shutterstock
14 / 30 Fotos
The love we share will always stay the same - Change is a natural part of life. Relationships and love are always evolving. If the love is healthy and well nourished, it will grow and become stronger over time, even if there are days when a person questions their love for their partner.
© Shutterstock
15 / 30 Fotos
Love means not expressing yourself out of fear that the relationship will end - Love requires transparency, truth, respect, and dignity. If you hide parts of yourself in order to prevent hurting or scaring off your partner, you will end up living in a prison instead of a relationship.
© Shutterstock
16 / 30 Fotos
Long-distance relationships are doomed to fail - The family therapist said that when long distance relationships fail, it's not necessarily because the couple aren't determined to make it work. It means that there were signals that went unnoticed or were interpreted wrong.
© Shutterstock
17 / 30 Fotos
You spend hours talking with other people online but I know you love me
- If your partner spends hours talking to people on social media when they could be with you, they might need a reminder about where their priorities lie.
© Shutterstock
18 / 30 Fotos
Love means suffering - Love is not equal to torture and suffering. Even if there are difficult moments, your relationship should never feel like a constant burden.
© Shutterstock
19 / 30 Fotos
I can't live without them - It's one thing to love a person and another to depend on them for survival, emphasizes Margarida Vieite.
© Shutterstock
20 / 30 Fotos
We don't have a life together as a couple, but our love can still return - If a couple doesn't spend time together and instead suffers in order to save their relationship, they don't belong together. The love will not likely return, and the lack of affection will only increase the distance, revolt, and anger between the two people.
© Shutterstock
21 / 30 Fotos
Having a relationship is synonymous with being loved and being happy - There are millions of people in the world that are in a relationship but don't feel loved nor happy, and vice versa. In many cases, these people have a fear of being alone.
© Shutterstock
22 / 30 Fotos
You can live without love - As human beings, we need both self-love and the love of others. However it doesn't necessarily mean just romantic love.
© Shutterstock
23 / 30 Fotos
The life we live makes me unable to end the relationship - You can always end a bad relationship. However, you may be afraid of the unknown and experience anxiety and insecurity about the future.
© Shutterstock
24 / 30 Fotos
The life we live makes me unable to end the relationship - Other reasons for someone not having the courage to end a relationship are: being afraid of what others will think, feeling guilty about ending the relationship, and holding the belief that a lack of love is not reason enough to end a life the two of you have built together.
© Shutterstock
25 / 30 Fotos
The life we live makes me unable to end the relationship - Many people don't end a relationship because they're afraid of being alone and not finding anyone else who loves them. Lots of older people have financial reasons because poverty among the elderly is a huge problem in our society.
© Shutterstock
26 / 30 Fotos
In order to save the relationship, I must force myself and hurt more - One party is not responsible for the success of the relationship. When one person gives significantly more, it can create an imbalance in the relationship and make the mismatch even clearer, according to the family therapist.
© Shutterstock
27 / 30 Fotos
I can love for the both of us - A healthy and loving relationship implies that both people love each other equally, says Margarida Vieite. The love that we don't feel or that our partner doesn't feel cannot be substituted.
© Shutterstock
28 / 30 Fotos
Love means that another person makes you soar, shine and feel happy
- This is absolutely true! Your love should make you feel comfortable, strong, and courageous, and lift your self-esteem.
© Shutterstock
29 / 30 Fotos
Common misconceptions about love
- There isn't a single formula or list of rules about love. Every relationship is unique and everyone behaves and relates to love in different ways. The base of any relationship is trust and respect, although there are many false (yet popular) ideas about how to love another person. According to Margarida Vieite, a specialist in family therapy at the University of Seville, many of these misleading ideas seem romantic, but in reality may actually be quite toxic. Don't let yourself get fooled by the following lies about love!
© Shutterstock
0 / 30 Fotos
If you are jealous, you are crazy about me! - According to Margarida Vieite, a specialist in family therapy at the University of Seville, when our partner is over-the-top jealous, it's a sign that they need help. Jealousy reveals deep-seeded insecurity, and low self-esteem, and can be a sign of an obsessive disorder.
© Shutterstock
1 / 30 Fotos
Love at first sight - Love is reciprocal and requires hard work, acceptance, and forgiveness. According to the specialist, it arises from mutual appreciation and trust.
© Shutterstock
2 / 30 Fotos
Now that I won you over, you're mine! - Winning over your significant other is a daily process. We don't belong to anyone but ourselves, and people are not possessions.
© Shutterstock
3 / 30 Fotos
If you don't call me after a first date, you don't love me - Calm down! No one falls in love at first sight. Even if the date was incredible for both people, not calling the next day doesn't necessarily mean that the other person is not interested. According to Margarida Vieite, love involves getting to know and discover who the other person is. It requires time.
© Shutterstock
4 / 30 Fotos
My other half is out there somewhere... - You don't need another person to feel complete. You already are.
© Shutterstock
5 / 30 Fotos
Love means doing everything together! - Doing activities together is great, but loving someone also means giving them the freedom to live their own lives and do things alone or with friends, family, and coworkers. Everyone needs to respect the individuality of their partner.
© Shutterstock
6 / 30 Fotos
You say that you like me, but I need to pressure you to be with me - If someone really loves another person, they will make time to be with them even if they are busy, according to the family therapist.
© Shutterstock
7 / 30 Fotos
I believe you love me but you criticize, blame, and laugh at me - Some people have distorted ideas about love. Putting down another person, laughing at them, or blaming them for something they have no control over is definitely not love.
© Shutterstock
8 / 30 Fotos
If you love me, do everything I say - Loving another person does not make them your slave. It means hearing their wants, needs, and priorities, without sacrificing your own interests, dreams, and goals, according to Margarida Vieite.
© Shutterstock
9 / 30 Fotos
Love means not having any differences
- Many people search for someone who shares the same interests and opinions. However, having differences between you and your partner is actually healthy, as you both learn to respect the individuality of the other.
© Shutterstock
10 / 30 Fotos
Love means not having any differences - However, when differences involve principles, values, relationship styles, and life goals, it can be difficult to maintain a relationship.
© Shutterstock
11 / 30 Fotos
It's possible to love without trust - The base of a healthy relationship is honesty, respect, and trust. The psychologist confirms that if you cannot trust your partner, you can never fully give yourself to them and love them.
© Shutterstock
12 / 30 Fotos
Fighting means you don't love each other - It's acceptable to have arguments. When the emotions get intense, it's important to try to remain calm and hear the point of view of the other person.
© Shutterstock
13 / 30 Fotos
If you pressure me to be intimate, it's because you love me - A person who pressures another into having physical relations does not love nor respect the will of their partner.
© Shutterstock
14 / 30 Fotos
The love we share will always stay the same - Change is a natural part of life. Relationships and love are always evolving. If the love is healthy and well nourished, it will grow and become stronger over time, even if there are days when a person questions their love for their partner.
© Shutterstock
15 / 30 Fotos
Love means not expressing yourself out of fear that the relationship will end - Love requires transparency, truth, respect, and dignity. If you hide parts of yourself in order to prevent hurting or scaring off your partner, you will end up living in a prison instead of a relationship.
© Shutterstock
16 / 30 Fotos
Long-distance relationships are doomed to fail - The family therapist said that when long distance relationships fail, it's not necessarily because the couple aren't determined to make it work. It means that there were signals that went unnoticed or were interpreted wrong.
© Shutterstock
17 / 30 Fotos
You spend hours talking with other people online but I know you love me
- If your partner spends hours talking to people on social media when they could be with you, they might need a reminder about where their priorities lie.
© Shutterstock
18 / 30 Fotos
Love means suffering - Love is not equal to torture and suffering. Even if there are difficult moments, your relationship should never feel like a constant burden.
© Shutterstock
19 / 30 Fotos
I can't live without them - It's one thing to love a person and another to depend on them for survival, emphasizes Margarida Vieite.
© Shutterstock
20 / 30 Fotos
We don't have a life together as a couple, but our love can still return - If a couple doesn't spend time together and instead suffers in order to save their relationship, they don't belong together. The love will not likely return, and the lack of affection will only increase the distance, revolt, and anger between the two people.
© Shutterstock
21 / 30 Fotos
Having a relationship is synonymous with being loved and being happy - There are millions of people in the world that are in a relationship but don't feel loved nor happy, and vice versa. In many cases, these people have a fear of being alone.
© Shutterstock
22 / 30 Fotos
You can live without love - As human beings, we need both self-love and the love of others. However it doesn't necessarily mean just romantic love.
© Shutterstock
23 / 30 Fotos
The life we live makes me unable to end the relationship - You can always end a bad relationship. However, you may be afraid of the unknown and experience anxiety and insecurity about the future.
© Shutterstock
24 / 30 Fotos
The life we live makes me unable to end the relationship - Other reasons for someone not having the courage to end a relationship are: being afraid of what others will think, feeling guilty about ending the relationship, and holding the belief that a lack of love is not reason enough to end a life the two of you have built together.
© Shutterstock
25 / 30 Fotos
The life we live makes me unable to end the relationship - Many people don't end a relationship because they're afraid of being alone and not finding anyone else who loves them. Lots of older people have financial reasons because poverty among the elderly is a huge problem in our society.
© Shutterstock
26 / 30 Fotos
In order to save the relationship, I must force myself and hurt more - One party is not responsible for the success of the relationship. When one person gives significantly more, it can create an imbalance in the relationship and make the mismatch even clearer, according to the family therapist.
© Shutterstock
27 / 30 Fotos
I can love for the both of us - A healthy and loving relationship implies that both people love each other equally, says Margarida Vieite. The love that we don't feel or that our partner doesn't feel cannot be substituted.
© Shutterstock
28 / 30 Fotos
Love means that another person makes you soar, shine and feel happy
- This is absolutely true! Your love should make you feel comfortable, strong, and courageous, and lift your self-esteem.
© Shutterstock
29 / 30 Fotos
Common misconceptions about love
Many people believe misleading information about how to maintain a healthy relationship
© Shutterstock
There
isn't a single
formula
or list
of rules about
love. Every relationship is unique
and
everyone
behaves and
relates to love
in different ways. The
base
of any
relationship
is trust
and
respect, although there
are
many
false (yet
popular) ideas
about
how
to love
another person.
According to Margarida Vieite, a specialist in family therapy at the University of Seville,
many of these misleading ideas seem
romantic, but in reality
may actually be quite toxic.
Don't
let yourself
get
fooled
by the
following
lies about
love!
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