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An overview of adult bullying -

Adults who engage in bullying are usually more likely to do so in ways that are not physical. However, there can be cases in which physical abuse occurs alongside bullying. When it comes to adult bullying, the perpetrators tend to fall into specific categories.

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Adult bully with narcissistic traits -

An adult bully with narcissistic tendencies can be so self-involved that they may ignore the needs of those around them. When they choose to bully other adults, they often do so because they lack empathy or fear of potential consequences. They generally experience self-esteem issues, which can lead to a compulsion to humiliate other people.

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Impulsive adult bully -

This type of adult bully tends to engage in sporadic and uncontrolled bullying. Sometimes they bully when they're under stress or going through a tough time, which, of course, doesn't excuse it.

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Physical adult bully -

Physical adult bullies typically perpetuate bullying by hitting, kicking, slapping, or otherwise physically assaulting others. They may also stalk, steal from, or destroy the personal property of their targets. A physical bully may experience challenges with anger management and other potential psychological issues.

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Verbal adult bully -

Verbal adult bullies tend to use their words to belittle people, and can be considered passive-aggressive. Some verbal adult bullies may spread rumors, gossip about others, and otherwise use words to hurt their targets.

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Secondary adult bullies -

Secondary adult bullies can be defined as witnesses to the actions of the bully who generally choose to join in so they won't become the bully's next target. They're most likely afraid to speak out against the bully's behavior.

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How to deal with adult bullies -

If you're the victim of an adult bully, there are a few things you can do to protect yourself. Remember: you don't need to accept these kinds of behaviors.

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Distance - If you work together, take preventive measures to not be around the bully more than absolutely necessary.

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Seek support - Seek emotional support in friends and family, and consider accessing counseling for yourself.

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Document the bullying - Carefully document all bullying, harassment, intimidation, and retaliation incidences. You might need proof to report the bully.

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Work on your confidence - Strengthen and build your own self-confidence to help you deal with the bully. Some tips include meditating or writing a journal.

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Talk with the bully - You can even try discussing the problem directly with the bully. But you may want to have someone with you.

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Talk to HR -

If the bullying is occurring at work, discuss it with a supervisor or human resources.

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Make eye contact -

Eye contact can be important, as bullies have less empathy when they can't see your face or your eyes.

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Know that they might not change - You have to understand that you won't be able to change the bully if they don't wish to change. However, you may be able to alter the situation (but not their personality).

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Pick and choose your battles -

Choosing how to react depends on the amount and severity of the bullying behaviors. If the behavior is not excessive or harmful, you may want to keep your distance. Therefore, consider picking your battles if it isn't directly harmful to you.

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Have support - Make sure to build a support network around you who empathize with you and protect you. Moreover, they might even serve as witnesses if needed.

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Escape if you can -

If you work in an office, ask to move your desk far away from the bully or limit your interactions with them whenever possible.

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Try not to react - Keep your reactions and responses to a minimum when dealing with the bully. Sometimes they just want a reaction.

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Think about your body language - Maintain positive, strong body language while dealing with a bully. It will also help with your confidence.

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Don't get physical - Avoid physical altercations and shouting matches at all costs. In the end, this can even cost you your job in certain situations.

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Don't take it personally -

It might be hard, but do your best not to take the situation personally; this person is a serial bully.

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What to do if you're a bystander -

There are several things that bystanders to bullying can do. To start with, you can utilize humor to redirect the conversation.

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Question -

Question the behavior of the bully to shift the focus of the interaction. Getting someone to explain their bullying can help them see they're in the wrong.

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Remember, there is strength in numbers -

Bystanders can intervene as a group to show their disagreement with the bullying.

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Be good company -

Walk with the person who is the victim of the bullying to help defuse potential interactions.

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Check in - Check in privately with the bullied person to let them know you disagree with it and that you care. This shows your support.

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What to do if you're a perpetrator -

In many cases with bullies, they may have had a traumatic childhood and regularly endured domestic violence or other forms of abuse. Therefore, if you're a perpetrator, consider seeking emotional support or therapy.

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Mental health effects of bullying -

Even if you're not on the receiving end, research has shown that even witnessing workplace bullying is associated with an increased risk of developing depressive symptoms. For victims, you may have trouble sleeping, feel paranoid, and/or experience increased anxiety.

Sources: (Verywell Mind) (Psychology Today) 

See also: 30 of the best ways to improve your mental health

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