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If I cry, you cry -

Chinese media recently reported the case of a young woman who took revenge on her cheating boyfriend, whom she cried over for three days. She sent 1,000 kg (about 2,200 lbs) of onions to his doorstep, all so he could cry as much as she did.

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If I cry, you cry -

Sources say the delivery man had to single-handedly unload dozens of bags of onions and carry them to the designated address, a task that reportedly made him say, “If he doesn’t cry, I certainly will."

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Get it in ink -

A Twitter user confessed that when her boyfriend cheated on her, instead of confronting him, she convinced him to get matching tattoos. “He went first and I went home,” she said.

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This house is not your home -

In 2015, 42-year-old Laura Arnolds found out that her husband was cheating on her while he was away on business trips. She came up with the perfect revenge plot: she sold their house while he was away on another business trip, including all his prized possessions in it.

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This house is not your home -

Her parents had taken over the mortgage of their property, so she was able to sell the house quickly to a group of students. The husband came home quite late one night, expecting to find his wife tucked in bed, but was instead greeted by “what looked like a 21-year-old hippie,” he told the press.

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It's not over until I say it’s over -

A French woman who worked as a high-ranking judge in Hauts-de-Seine was left by her husband for another woman, whom she’d worked for in the past. Devastated by the blow, she decided to forge documents to remarry her ex-husband, using an impersonator as stand-in, without his knowledge.

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It's not over until I say it’s over -

She is now facing up to 10 years in prison and a hefty fine of up to US$170,000 for this impressively twisted strategy meant to keep him from moving on with his life.

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The bird that won’t fly -

In 2013, Michigan man Alan Markovitz made headlines for moving into a home next door to his ex-wife, who had left him for another man. But he simply wasn’t satisfied with being a constant intrusion on their new life together...

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The bird that won’t fly -

He proceeded to erect a bronze statue in his backyard facing the other house—a 12-foot (3.7 m) tall, US$7,000 middle finger statue. It even had a spotlight trained on it at night.

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Making money off heartbreak -

In 2016, an angry husband made headlines for selling his “cheating wife’s belongings” on eBay, after she reportedly ran off with someone. He listed piles of clothing, shoes, and even a black Smart car.

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Making money off heartbreak -

The scorned lover also revealed that he planned to use the proceeds to commission the services of adult entertainment professionals in his marital home, and buy enough Scotch to drink himself into a coma.

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You’re not going anywhere -

A woman confessed to Thrillist that her ex-boyfriend was so terrible that in a moment of fury she shredded his passport. She said, "If he wasn't going anywhere with me, he wasn't going anywhere. Period."

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Haunted house -

A man left a product review on Amazon for a Wi-Fi enabled thermostat that can be controlled from a distance, detailing how his wife left him for another man and took the house, the dog, and a good chunk of his fortune with her. But she didn’t change the thermostat or Wi-Fi…

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Haunted house -

The man said he enjoys forcing the new couple to wake up to frigid winter mornings, and when he knows they’re away he cranks the heat up, lowering it before they arrive, just to hike up their electricity bills.

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Pay it forward -

In 2019, a Florida woman left a US$5,000 tip to a waitress using her boyfriend’s credit card—revenge cloaked in generosity. The woman and her boyfriend had gotten into an argument, and she wanted to get back at him. Unfortunately, her plan backfired, and she was arrested on a felony theft charge.

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Getting someone else to do the dirty work -

A story shared on Reddit details a man who found out the love of his life was cheating on him. He didn’t tell her he knew, but packed her things up from his apartment and drove to her mother’s house, letting her know that they were over, thanking her for everything she did for him, and crying...

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Getting someone else to do the dirty work -

He never broke up with or even spoke to the girl again. The method behind the madness? He wanted the mother to know the daughter screwed up since she would be in her life as a constant reminder. He wanted to create a rift between their essential mother-daughter bond.

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Smells fishy -

Someone from Texas told Whisper, a secret-sharing platform, that after their boyfriend cheated on them, they put tuna fish in his bedposts. He reportedly never found out where the worsening smell was coming from, and even moved to another place because of it.

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From weird to weirder -

In 2017, a man in St. Petersburg, Russia was upset that his wife legally changed her last name without his permission after they’d been experiencing a rough patch. She reportedly changed it to the name of a local supermarket, as part of a promotion they had offering to pay US$880 a month to loyal and willing customers.

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From weird to weirder -

As revenge, he decided to drive her beloved car to that supermarket and fill it up with concrete. No word on whether she changed her name back.

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Stone-cold subconscious -

A woman told Thrillist she actually didn’t think she had a problem with her ex-boyfriend until she ran into him at a New Year’s Eve party. She was leaving before him and when she noticed that it was snowing, she took his shoes. 

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Revenge is a dish best served spicy - A woman confessed that while she was married she had a suspicion that her husband was cheating on her. She found a box of open condoms in his car, poked tiny holes in the packaging, and soaked them in habanero pepper juice, dried them, and put them back…

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Revenge is a dish best served spicy -

Her husband left to “help his mom,” and her best friend later called to tell her after having sex with her “boyfriend” she was on fire down there! Of course, her husband also came home and applied an ice pack. Those relationships ended, but the cheaters still don’t know what she did.

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Poetic justice -

One woman left a break-up letter for her boyfriend who left his Facebook open along with the messages he got from the woman he was cheating with. But instead of breaking his stuff, she decided to make a game since her boyfriend was such a player.

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Poetic justice -

She left his clothes where they first met, his video games where they first kissed, his laptop where they bought their first video game together, his TV where they first had sex, and everything else at the other woman’s house. This ingenious scavenger hunt led him through their entire relationship, beginning to end.

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Attention-grabbing -

In 2006, a huge billboard in NYC went viral that read, “Hi Steven, Do I have your attention now? I know all about her, you dirty, sneaky, immoral, unfaithful, poorly-endowed slimeball. Everything’s caught on tape.”

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Attention-grabbing -

She signed it “Your (soon-to-be-ex) Wife,” and added, “P.S. I paid for this billboard from our joint bank account.” Some reports say it’s not real, but someone went so far as to make coinciding blog posts.

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Extra! Extra! - When Texas woman Timeshia Brown discovered that her husband had gotten another woman pregnant, she took out a newspaper classifieds ad in her hometown of 10,000-plus residents. “I would like to say congratulations to Shara Cormier and Patrick Brown…They are expecting a baby. Hope you both are really in love and I hope it works out. Always, Patrick’s wife.”

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Art therapy -

When Kevin Cotter's wife left him, she also left her wedding dress. Partly in revenge and partly art therapy, he started turning it into various things, including a scarecrow, pasta strainer, car cover, and 98 other things, all while documenting it on a blog, which later became the book '101 Uses For My Ex-Wife's Wedding Dress.'

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The slow burn -

In a Tumblr post, a woman wrote about how she dealt with a cheating boyfriend: she slashed his tire, but not the ones on his car—the spare. She was all about the endgame.

See also: Incredible cases of instant karma.

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