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Can an age gap affect relationships? -

If your relationship has a big age difference, it might impact your connection in specific ways. However, this isn't unique to relationships with a large age gap.

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Emotional maturity -

In relationships with a large emotional gap, the more mature partner could end up carrying a heavier emotional load in the relationship. This can be exhausting.

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Being older doesn't guarantee maturity -

Still, being the older partner doesn’t guarantee emotional maturity, just like being younger doesn’t always mean you’re less mature.

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Why people get maturity wrong -

People sometimes connect age with emotional maturity because more years can mean more time to form complex perspectives.

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Priorities -

The bigger the gap between partners, the more likely the relationship will struggle with phase-of-life related challenges.

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Common challenges -

Some common challenges might include differences in energy levels, life priorities, and plans to start a family.

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Different priorities aren’t exclusive to relationships with large age gaps -

Just like in any relationship, it’s key to discuss each person’s priorities for the future. Especially if you're looking for a long-term relationship.

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What's a good age difference? -

In many cultures, it's most common in relationships for the man to be two to three years older than the woman. But does it make for a good age gap?

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The statistics -

An Australian study from 2017 found that couples with large age gaps had a faster decline in relationship satisfaction in their first six to 10 years than similarly aged couples.

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Age gap and depression -

A Korean study from 2015 found that same-aged couples had the lowest rates of depression, while couples with an age gap of three years or more had slightly higher rates.

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Statistically the ideal age gap -

Overall, research seems to indicate that an age cap of one to three years is considered ideal in most cultures. But some researchers suggest even an age gap of less than 10 years will bring more satisfaction.

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Love is more than just a number -

Still, numbers can't tell us everything about love. It's clearly possible to have a big age difference and be in the right relationship (for you).

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Problems with age differences in relationships -

Some couples with large age differences might, however, encounter certain roadblocks.

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Social stigma -

In cultures where small age gaps are more common, others may treat couples with a large age difference with judgment or criticism. This can be especially hurtful when friends or family are skeptical of your relationship.

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Power imbalance -

Large age differences can provoke unbalanced power dynamics, as an older partner might assume an authoritative role. It can also occur if one partner uses their partner’s financial dependence as a way to control them.

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How to bridge the gap -

Whether you’re dealing with critical family and friends, or concerns about the future of the relationship, the following tips could help you overcome certain challenges.

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Set boundaries -

Setting boundaries with judgmental loved ones will remind them that even if they don't understand your relationship, they need to respect it.

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Communicate -

Like with any relationship, couples need to have open and honest conversations about challenges and concerns.

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Consider your responses to others -

It might also be necessary to think of a few comebacks for the most common comments you receive.

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Share expectations -

Knowing your partner's expectations is particularly important when you're far apart in age. Therefore, share your expectations open and honestly to avoid any miscommunications.

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Accept the differences -

From interests to perspectives, chances are you'll encounter many differences with your partner. So instead of trying to force them to conform to your lifestyle, be supportive of where they are in theirs.

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Identify mutual interests -

Embrace the age gap by focusing on your mutual interests. Spend time doing things you both love, and explore each other's worlds by trying new things.

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Face uncertainty -

Whatever you do, don't allow your age gap to become the elephant in the room. If there are any issues, work to find mutually acceptable solutions.

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Create some space -

Maintaining a sense of individuality within your relationship can be just as important as cultivating shared experiences. The balance is essential.

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Know that maturity is relative -

If you're the older one, you have to view your significant other as a full-grown adult. And if you're the younger one, avoid referring to your partner as a "boomer" or "old-timer." Age alone isn't the only barometer of maturity.

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Consider your role as caretaker -

An aging spouse may need long-term healthcare sooner than the other. If you're the younger partner, be honest and ask yourself if you're prepared to be a caretaker.

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Respect the relationship -

Understand that things can go smoothly or awry, and that isn't necessarily a byproduct of an age gap. A strong emotional and physical connection is much more important.

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Find your support network -

When dealing with outside judgment about your relationship, knowing similar couples helps. Not only does it create a sense of community, but it also builds new friendships.

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Counseling -

If you and your partner are finding it difficult to navigate these challenges alone, you can also turn to couples counseling.

Sources: (Psych Central) (Brides)

See also: Celebrities who experienced the loss of a partner

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